Stinky Flowers

They put a gold cap & tassel on Nate and sent him down the aisle to the Graduation song. So? Why was I bawling my eyes out? I search through all my emotions and tried to label this overwhelming wave that came crashing down on me. “Am I happy? Sad? Proud? Scared? Relieved he passed and I don’t have to pay for it again?” All the above.

It’s amazing how these two little boys have been in my life for such a small amount of time and yet have completely taken over my entire being. One glance from their eyes, one word from their mouths can send me into a full spectrum of emotions. I feel like Sybil most days.

I think this is what Kodak would call "a moment".

We love our Montessori school. They did an amazing job with the graduating ceremony. It was filled with proud accomplishments, symbolic traditions and cake. Nothing keeps a 2 1/2 year old interested in his brother’s program more than a promise of cake at the end. Except maybe:

All the other little brothers & sisters were restless and crying. Why? No lollipops.

It took 2 lollipops to get through the ceremony. That, and I had to hold him on my back, piggy-back style.  I had Zeke on my back licking his lolly; one hand holding him on and the other hand alternating taking photos/wiping tears. Every quiet moment in the program was filled with Zekey’s exclaims of, “MMMmmm…dat good! MMmmm, mmmm, mmmm, delish! Dollipop is good!” He did enjoy the graduates’ songs. They opened with the “Continents Song” then wowed the crowd with the “50 states” song. They rounded out their set list with “One Small Voice” which they signed as well as sang…a real crowd-pleaser. When they were finished, Zeke started yelling requests, “ABCs! Sing ABCs!” The ABC song is his “Freebird”.

It was Nate's night, but somehow, Zeke always finds a way to steal a little thunder.

I cannot believe that I’m sitting here crying again. Looking at these photos has turned me into a blubbering idiot …again. But I think I get it now. These are Mommy tears. When you spend every second of every day and night with these little humans, feeding them, clothing them, wiping every orifice on them…teaching them, scolding them, cleaning up after them because sometimes it’s not worth the battle to make them do it…and just when you feel like it’s all for nothing – like you’re banging your head against a wall and no one’s listening…you blink and your baby’s wearing a graduation cap, standing in front of a crowd of people, giving the “thumbs up” sign because he sees me crying. That sweet moment lasted a nano-second. Then he started emphatically signing for me to take his picture – he was next to get his diploma. (sigh)

I wrote about it in his “therapy journal”. I figure he can just hand over the book to his therapist someday. It will save lots of time and money trying to regress and remember what happened to him in his childhood.

Here’s the scene:  Nate was getting his very first trophy for playing T-Ball. It was very informal. We were all standing around a picnic table at a park. The coach said a little something about each player before he handed them their trophy and everyone clapped for that player. When he finished the last player and the clapping died down I simply said, “Hey, team…let’s hear it for Coach T!  Hip, hip hooray! Hip, hip hooray! And Nate spun his head around and glared at me, “Maaaaaaaaaaam!” and he put his 5 1/2 year old finger to his lips and said, “Shhhhhh!” I new it would happen someday, but really? Hip, hip hooray was the deal breaker? I’m thinking that kid better toughen up…does he know what I do for a living?

The scene of the crime

Just wait till he hears me barking like Arsenio Hall at his Kindergarten graduation this week.

I didn’t plan this at all. I just thought: “I don’t have a Mother’s Day gift for the 4 Grandmas (Can you say divorce?) and I’m going to shave the boys for summer…I should capture their wild, raw little personalities.” So I threw the boys in the car and headed for the Picture People at the mall. Plain white tees, Mommy’s finger comb (and a little Mom-spit gel) and there you have it. This is what my boys look like every day. (Give and take a lot of dirt)

How did I get them to sit so still?  Bribes.

Zeke played with a bucket on his head. How much money have we spent on toys?

And Nate...well, Nate likes to "make mud, not war".

 Since baths were needed, I decided (after yet another morning of screaming bed-head taming) since the temperature has hit the 90s, that it was time for the summer buzz cuts. Nate’s been through it several years in a row and loves it but it was Zeke’s first dance with the clippers.   

Before...

After!

 Zeke took a LOT more coaxing…Dora on the TV; popsicle in hand AND a promised lollipop when it was all done.      Hey, I’m not ashamed. I would have let him drink wine and smoke cigarettes if it would have made him sit still.   

Before...(yeah, I know)

After!

Tomorrow is a big day…one of those ”milestone days” you talk about the rest of your life. My kindergartener, Nate is visiting the lower elementary class at school. Sort of a practice day for this fall when he’s not my baby anymore. If you ask him now, he’ll emphatically tell you, “I”M NOT A BABY ANYMORE!” then 15 minutes later ask me to pick him up to “snuggle” like we did when he was little.” {sigh}

Nate is 5 1/2. I love 5 1/2. Young enough to still want to cuddle with Mommy in the cozy corner of the couch but old enough to wipe his own butt…well, most of the time. Zeke is 2 1/2. I’m not a big fan of 2 1/2. Thinks he’s old enough to do everything by himself and has a body-writhing, strangers-staring-at-you-in-judgement tantrum if you don’t let him… AND he’s still in diapers.

While the kindergarteners are previewing all the exciting and challenging work in their new class, Zeke and the other Montessori “newbies” will be clearing shelves, screaming for Mom and terrorizing class pets. I’m supposed to drop him off at 9:30am and pick him up at 11:00. Well, let’s see…I’ve brought him to the gym daycare and I get buzzed to get him usually after 22 mins. Long enough for him to play with a few toys, check out the video playing on the TV and drink his cup of soymilk.  I’m taking bets for tomorrow. The teachers are awesome and there are lots of things in the class that will interest him…I give him 27 minutes.